The Facebook photo

If you have a Facebook account, you'll probably notice that the profile pics people choose fall into a couple of broad categories.

Here's a quick field guide:

• What's wrong with your shoulders: This is the photo people take of themselves, by holding the camera out in front of them. You can't see their arms, but it seems there is something weird about the shoulders -- until you realize they're like that because the arms aren't hanging down but are held out in front of the body instead.
  
• Half a face: Extreme close-ups. There's half a face, part of the face, the face at a weird angle. Not good if you have zits, I suppose. Then again, what else is Photoshop for?
  
• On the beach: Maybe it's because I live in Atlantic Canada. People shot from the middle distance. Another variation: on holiday, or just relaxing and looking like you're on holiday.
• Copyright infringement: Photos of cartoon characters (The Flintsones), famous people (Ozzy Osbourne, Zakk Wylde) and so on.
• With the kids: Young parents, mostly. I am cool and I have kids too!
• The pet: Close-up of a cat or dog's face. Is it your cat? Your dog? Are you too closely identified with your animals? Or are you being savvy about your privacy?
• The glamour shot: I am so sexy!
• The self-conscious: A bad photo. Generally comes with comments from the profile's owner about how bad the photo is.
• The illustration: For the artistes among us.
  

Then, of course, there are the people who change their photos every day. Or several times a day. Many of them, it seems, writers. Procrastination anyone?

Share the Road

It always gets me when public responsibilities become shifted to individuals. Here's an example.

Andy Riga blogged yesterday and today about his experiences riding a bike in downtown Montreal. The situation is maybe marginally better in Halifax, though Montreal has the better bike paths.

I quit riding my bike to work in Montreal after a car door threw me into the middle of Decarie Blvd at rush hour one afternoon. I loved riding, but I didn’t love nearly being killed.

In Halifax we have a bike path down the St. Margaret’s Bay Road, right as you enter the Halifax Peninsula, that is tiny, narrow and poorly marked. It ends suddenly (for no apparent reason), and the road carries on. The bike path’s terminus is marked by a sign showing a cyclist and a car, and bearing the slogan “Share the road.” Yeah, well it would be a whole lot easier to share it if there were a bike path.

Instead of the municipality taking some responsibility for actually building decent paths for cyclists, they do basically nothing. But drivers and cyclists are asked to "share the road." That's right kids. And if we all hold hands and smile, the world will be a much nicer place too.

Absurd Nova Scotia tourism ad

Nova Scotia has no idea how to brand itself. Or it has the wrong idea. No wonder tourism is dropping, and dropping, and dropping.

Case in point: a full-page ad in the new Reader's Digest (it's run elsewhere too) showing a hunky (I guess) guy in a kilt. He's leaning against a wall and holding a hammer.


Here is part of the copy that goes with the ad:

Tradition Doesn't Always Come with Grey Hair and a Cane

Since the kilt is rich in history and custom. you can see why many men to this day still wear one. You can also get a pretty good look at their legs.

This is a real winner, ain't it? First, it's offensive, second it's ridiculous. Maybe it's so ridiculous it's offensive.

Buddy in the ad is holding a hammer. Presumably it's not to use on the people mounting this campaign. So he must be some kind of construction worker I guess. The kind that wears a kilt to work. The kind that doesn't exist.

Just show him step-dancing or fiddling instead and get it over with.

Who is the audience for this? The ad is trying to appeal to the young hipster type, but also to emphasize tradition. Enter the URL that accompanies the ad and you don't get to the main Nova Scotia tourism page, but to the one that highlights the history of the province. It shows a dude playing a redcoat banging a drum.

To me, every single thing about this ad sends one strong message: We have no idea what the hell we are doing.

Heavy sleeper

Man gets shot in the head, doesn't realize it until he wakes up, several hours later, and sees the blood.

Full story, from AP, via the Washington post.

World's first!

My thanks to Andy Riga for sending me the ridiculous press release below.

1) How many screenwriters send out a release that their script is "almost complete?" Now there's a news peg for you.

2) The film is "the world's first Russian-Canadian co-production." Excuse me, "the world's first?" How about "The first Russian-Canadian co-production." Can there be any Russian-Canadian co-productions in other countries? If not, we don't need the word "world" (unless we want to sound much more impressive than we really are).

3) "...an intriguing story." Intriguing! My favourite word! Perhaps it will be "fascinating" too.

4) I have only gotten through the first paragraph and I am tired already.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
TROJAN. Ruse de Sioux KGB
Russian screenwriter Aleksandr Borodyanskiy announces his latest script, and the beginning of the world’s first Russian-Canadian co-production

Toronto – May 16, 2007 Professor Aleksandr Borodyanskiy, a well-known Russian screenwriter, film director and actor, has announced he is working on his latest feature film script. When complete, the screenplay will tell an intriguing story about the arrest of a suspected Kremlin spy in Canada. The script has already been registered with the copyright societies of Russia and Canada under the name Canadian Spy Kremlin. The working title for the film is Trojan, and Borodyanskiy has announced that his script is almost complete. When the finished screenplay is ready to enter production, it will mark the beginning of the world’s first co-production between Russia and Canada. Borodyanskiy is excited to announce his work on this script, as he has been fascinated with espionage themes since his early years. “For me, a spy is a person whose life is interesting and extraordinary,” said Borodyanskiy. Despite the theme’s serious nature, Borodyanskiy’s screenplay will be a lyric drama and tragic comedy. The film will be filled with both humor and irony, with a plot loosely based on the story of Paul William Hampel. “The prototype of my film’s hero is a man named Paul Hampel, who was arrested in Canada last November, and deported to Russia in December,” said Borodyanskiy the to Russian information agency Interfax. Hampel was a fictitious name used by a man who was arrested at a Montreal airport in November 2006, after the Canadian government accused him of being a Russian spy. Hampel later admitted through his lawyer that he was indeed a Russian citizen, with no legal status in Canada, but he did not admit to being involved in espionage. During Hampel’s trial, a Federal Court judge agreed to withhold the man’s real name over concerns for the safety of his family. In exchange, Hampel did not contest deportation to Russia. The man living as Hampel had managed to obtain a valid Canadian passport, and had made frequent trips to Europe during his time in Canada. Interfax picked up on a possible connection between the story of Paul William Hampel and that of another famous Russian dissident named Aleksandr Litvinenko. When asked whether the film will touch on the famous story of the poisoning of ex-KGB agent Litvinenko, Borodyanskiy withheld details, and replied “as far as Litvinenko is concerned I can only say that my hero has also been visiting Europe on numerous occasions as well.”

Aleksandr Borodyanskiy Upon resignation from KGB, the Soviet Union Intelligence Service, Aleksandr Litvinenko made public accusations against his leaders saying they gave an order to kill Russian billionaire Boris Berezovskiy. After being arrested by Russian authorities, Litvinenko was released and fled to Europe. In November 2006, Litvinenko died of lethal radiation poisoning under highly suspicious circumstances. Two years after his death, Russian authorities began looking into Litvinenko’s accusations of the alleged KGB misdeeds. This led to public accusations that the Russian government was behind Litvinenko’s poisoning, and resulted in worldwide media coverage. A few years ago, Aleksandr Borodyanskiy wrote the script for a popular Russian film called Tycoon, which was released in 2002. Tycoon’s main character closely resembled billionaire Boris Berezovskiy. Borodyanskiy has written several espionage-themed scripts in his career, and is considered to be a master of spy films in Russia. His previous work includes writing a Russian-Chilean film called KGB Agents Also Fall in Love. Films based on his scripts have won numerous awards at film festivals around the world. Aleksandr Borodyanskiy is a well known screen writer in Russia. He has penned the scripts of numerous feature-length films, many of which have received recognition both in and outside of Russia. Borodyanskiy’s award-winning scripts include Afonya We Are From Jazz, Ground Zero, and American Daughter, among others. In total, Aleksandr Borodyanskiy has written over 50 scripts in various genres including drama, comedy, adventure, romance, and history. -30- Available for interviews: Aleksandr Borodyanskiy

Brother Yusef is amazing

Last week, on my way back from a school visit in Lockeport, two hours away from home, I stopped in at a second-hand clothing store -- one of the Frenchy's chain.

Frenchy's uusually has a bin with a few CDs, generally people's 70s and 80s castoffs: Debbie Harry, Earth Wind and Fire, Pat Benatar, Foreigner, that sort of thing. Stuff that was bad then and is worse now.

I pulled one CD out of the pathetic little pile. It had no cover, but said it was "Fattback Blues" by Brother Yusef. The album was called The Crossroads Project. It was $1.25, I bought it.

In the car, I had been listening to Calexico live in Stockholm. I have tried to like Calexico, but I can't do it. I am going to throw out the CD. I put in Brother Yusef, not knowing what to expect.

All I can say is: wow. The guy does incredible acoustic blues, banging out a bass line with his thumb while doing the rest with his other fingers. Great lyrics, soul-felt music, awesome guitar playing.

Don't take my word for it. Click the Brother Yusef link and listen to "Good Mornin' Blues" -- available as a free download (it also plays when you first load the page, so watch out if you are at work and your speakers are turned up).

I am not sure what to think of the fact that Brother Yusef's steady gig is playing in Downtown Disneyland three times a week. On the one hand, it's sad, sad, sad. The guy's blues are so heartfelt, and here he is in a sterile museum of American culture. On the other hand, as Sara says, it's probably as good a day job as a musician can ask for. It probably pays well, and he gets to play.

At least no animals were harmed

ATLANTA (AP) - A vegan couple were sentenced Wednesday to life in prison for the death of their malnourished 6-week-old baby boy, who was fed a diet largely consisting of soy milk and apple juice.

Full story here.

Seriously though, did these people have no support whatsoever? Nobody who could have figured out a bit sooner that something was wrong?

That would be some cross-cultural family jam session.

From today's Globe and Mail:

As it turns out, Jack White is a fourth cousin to Natalie MacMaster, a third cousin once removed to Buddy MacMaster, Natalie's father and "the dean of Atlantic fiddlers," and a double fourth cousin to Ashley MacIsaac. According to Daniel MacIsaac, Jack White's grandmother (and Daniel MacIsaac's aunt), Florence MacIsaac, was born in Nova Scotia in 1896 and later married a man named Frank Gillis with whom she established a home in Sydney Mines to raise a family that eventually included two girls and four sons. Times were tough in Nova Scotia, however, and in 1924 the Gillises moved to Detroit. Three years later, Florence Gillis gave birth to a boy, Gorman, who 48 years later fathered Jack White.

The MacMaster connection, in the meantime, comes courtesy of Florence's grandfather, John MacIsaac, who had a sister named Sarah "who married into the MacMaster clan." And as for Ashley MacIsaac, he is descended from Hector MacIsaac, a brother of John.

Gone Surfin' column

My latest Gone Surfin tech column is now available online. It's about using Google for more than just searching. The link is here, and in the permanent links on the right side of this page.

Bow-wow-wow

I was in St. John's for work this week, and stopped in at the Candy Bouquet. (Actually, stopping in at the Candy Bouquet was part of the job -- it's a long story.)

I can now report that if you are ever in St. John's and want candy, there is probably no person nicer than Jackie Rice of the Candy Bouquet to help you find what you want -- or what you didn't even know you wanted. And she manages to say "Have a sweet day" in a way that's genuinely sweet, and doesn't make you cringe.